Architecture
A building without structure is just a pile of bricks, the structure is the framework upon which you can create a beautiful environment for your life. Whilst necessary, a lot of it is invisible, boring and expensive, you can pour a small fortune into the foundations that you will never see again, but without that firm footing you only have a straw house that can be blown over by any passing wolf with bad breath. And structure is not limited to just architecture, your life needs the same, a good life situation provides the strength that empowers you to bring your full energy and resources to the task in hand rather than draining your concentration and awareness away with constant running repairs to your life. If you find that you are constantly engaged in little errands and maintenance issues whilst the big projects are sitting on the shelf because of a lack of time, that is a sign that the underlying structure of your life is failing in its task of giving you a firm base upon which to launch the best possible version of yourself.
Like a builder who sucks their teeth before telling you that it is going to be a very expensive and long project, I can guarantee that you already compiling a list of very real and special reasons that makes you an exception to the idea that you can have an empowered life. Every renovation job has its special and unique problems, no two will be the same, there might be damp in one house and eccentric electrics in another. The same is true for every single person in the world, children, lack of money, time or privilege, discrimination, education, knowledge and physical or mental illness, are the start of a nearly endless list of possibilities, however when we are all the exception it makes us all normal, and as we all have problems it means that we actually all start from the same position of having problems that need to be overcome, and for me I find a comfort in the idea that we all have our own equally unique set of challenges in any life situation. That it is difficulty for all of us and there is no exception from that rule, that is hard work for all of us and the only thing that really matters is that we are trying to be a little better than we were yesterday and that is all we need to grow as beings of consciousness, it is the one common element that we all share.
When we focus on the structure of our lives it is a tool to consider the underlying, unthought about pre-existing condition that currently underpins how we live our lives. It is how we are spending our time because of our environment and it does not stop at your front door, your environment is the place where you spend your time, the office part of your environment as is your commute. If you set up your life so that you have to drive back and forth for two hours every day, that is a structure that you have set up, it might be the best solution for your life but if you have not considered that you are making a trade, that it has consequences, it might be time to reconsider whether that higher paying job actually lowers your hourly wage. If you are a single person living in a mansion, you are paying a lot for space you might even need and using resources that could be better spent. If you are dual income family, the marginal benefits of a second person working might not be as significant as you think if you never actually done the spreadsheets to find out how much marginal income you are gaining, you could just be conforming to what you should be doing rather than what is actually in your best interests.
There are no right and wrong answers, it is all subjective and personal, it is up to you to ask the question, what you want? Then you have to decide whether your current life situation is actually delivering it. There is a tendency to retreat from overwhelming problem, some people find comfort in the idea that we are spiritual beings having a human experience, and pretend that it is just a question of changing your mindset to accept all suffering your life. Whilst acceptance is powerful and can change your experience of suffering, that does not mean that you abdicate action in reducing the suffering even when you change your relationship to it, seeing suffering as information reduces the wasted time and the multiplying effect of reacting badly to it, it does not mean that you do not take action. The human experience is the critical part to the spiritual being that wants to have the best possible experience, it wants to have the greatest story and a wonderful human experience, so embrace it, pursuing your wants is not a betrayal of that being, it is honouring it.
Take the time to detach yourself from being in your life, look over it like an objective architect, examine it and be fascinated by the ways you are experiencing your life. The military call this leadership detachment it allows you to be less involved in your personal reaction and instead see the whole of the situation, what is actually going on and this allows you to make better decisions. Do not judge yourself as you are doing this, we are all imperfect and have room for improvement, we all get to grow and do things a little bit better in our own time. Your structures do matter, being in light and airy places that have a connection to the natural world make us feel better, being able to spend time on the things we care about, even better to have them linked to an overarching purpose that gives meaning to our everyday activities. Whether that is to raise independent, healthy and happy human beings, or to create great art, the purpose only really matters if it matters to you, if it aligns with what is important to you, and as every life situation is unique, so every solution will be individually beautiful.
There is nothing off the table, including the table, there is no limit to what you can imagine, reality just gives us the lines within which to colour in, to create something that respects its environment without being constrained by it or the opinions of others. The only judgement that matters is yours and the people that you have decided to give due regard to, who's opinion you respect and trust which is not everyone, and certainly not social media. What matters is the journey towards being a little bit better, is taking steps everyday towards it, and the best way to do that is by being the best plausible version of you today. The most important action is the one that you take now, and in any moment there are a plausible range of action you could take from the best to the worst, life is just one of these moments after another, and by plausible, I mean plausible to you because the truth is that everyone of you can be so much better than you could plausibly imagine, we are our own worst critics, it is so much easier to see possible greatness in others, try and give yourself the same kindness, and build your perfect life in your ideal place.
