A reason to rule all of myself?

This is perhaps the most soulful call to arms that has ever been issued to an individual, it is a challenge to every one of us and a rallying call to our best selves. It is asking us to be the best version of ourselves in spite of our circumstances or life situation, to have the courage to take the responsibility and control for the whole of our lives, not just the appearance of success but the internal integrity of knowing it to be true, that we did the best with what we had in our own way. The Roman Emperor, Marcus Arelius, said that all he needed was, “a little flesh, a little breath and a reason to rule all of myself,” he ruled an empire but he never lived under the illusion he was special or that he was truly in control of that empire, he did not put his self-worth into wealth, power and status, what concerned him was his control over himself, his reactions, actions and character, and the reason he acted was for his brotherhood.

Arelius was clear that he needed a reason to exercise control, he was under no illusions that he was strong enough to take on that thankless responsibility and ceaseless pursuit of control without a purpose that was greater than what was in his natural grace. It was in duty to both his family, his community of brotherhood that he found a mission and purpose that was greater than himself, but at the same time a reason to rule himself. He accepted the company of the rude, prideful, greedy and vicious, he saw that people acted wrongly for the right reasons, and sometimes rightly for the sake of appearances and vanity. That the fates could be cruel to good people, and reward evil actions, that life was fundamentally unfair, despite which people could rise above it and impose human dignity on nature.

By modern standards of course Arelius was deeply flawed, though even just in trying to rise above the crowd, he was remarkable in his time, and perhaps he was unlucky not to have to try and live up to the huge expectations that we have for our own lives. Being self actualised, constantly being in alignment with our inner energies and having to self-report on our extraordinary lives (is there another sort on instagram?) is hugely challenging and adding these massive layers of complexity on top of just the basics human needs of being healthy and happy, seems like a recipe for disappointment. To do all this just for its own sake can be so hugely demotivating, it can seem like a Babel Tower without a summit, a marathon that never ends, it is not that surprising that so many people decide that is not even worth trying. Instead they decide to submit to someone else's will, and takes the deal of, give me a pay-check and a promise that everything is going to be okay, and I will trust you, just because it is easier than the alternative.

However you do not want to rely on empty promises, what you need is your own reason to rule yourself, and Arelius's own example should be a huge inspiration because on the face of it he had everything, the power, wealth and status. That was not what mattered, his intention was always on himself as that was the area that he could have full control and responsibility for. He could control the inner game not the results or external world, he could have been misled into vanity and the belief that he was superior, he never did because he was true to his mission and purpose, and that was probably the reason he rose the power in the first place. It important to note that this was not a trick, pretend you want a good character when secretly you want the shiny things, you have to want the character even at the expense of the other, and you would pay the price of foregoing the shiny things happily and without regret to have it.

Which begs the question, what is your reason to rule yourself? What is the mission and purpose that could drive a lifetime of self responsibility and control, it is probably best to focus on the areas where you can serve others and add value to their lives, which as a side product almost always means that you have to be ruthlessly kind to yourself so that you can be the best version of yourself for others. It can be surprising that the best motivation to treat yourself well is the service of others, until you realise the alternative is to be gloriously lazy and do nothing, as it is so often the easy thing to do. To wake up fresh and motivated, meditate, take long walks, eat protein and salads, are all things that are difficult to start when it is just for yourself despite however enjoyable they are once you start them, half the battle can be getting past the start line and it can be just easier to do it for someone else.

What you need is to find a purpose, any purpose, it can change, develop and evolve over time, it can just be a short-term purpose for the moment, which often turns out to be the most powerful kind. A simple mission like helping a friend or volunteering your time, it can be personal like teaching your child to tie their shoelaces. It can be big, writing the novel that changes the Zeitgeist of an era, or a personal article that speaks to a single person on the other side of the world, that helps and nurtures one persons life, these are all worth doing for them, but to be effective there must be a powerful reason for you to take the actions that give you control, and ability to rule all of yourself.

And it is only by ruling yourself that you are able to be effective in your mission. To be successful, you are going to have to be at the top of your game, to be fully engaged, you have to be able to bring all of your energy, all of your talent and use it effectively. You have to be undistracted by low-energy and poor self action, be the happiest and healthiest version of yourself, and whatever is plausible to you is possible and if it is possible it becomes your duty to your mission and purpose to become that version of yourself. And it is that duty, that reason that can drive you on, to persevere when things are tough and demonstrate resilience in poor circumstances, and you can use every experience on your journey to push the boundaries of what is plausible to you, how best you can be a growing being of consciousness, that is how you become the best version of yourself, it is in the furnace of real life we are able to recast ourselves into the type of people who succeed in their mission and rule the whole of themselves.